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Overcome your fear of speaking up for yourself at work

If you fear speaking up for yourself at work, there may be some internal factors holding you back. Joel Garfinkle offers strategies to overcome them.

3 min read

CommunicationLeadership

speaking up

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Let’s explore why you are afraid of speaking up for yourself at work, diving into the internal beliefs that cause you to hold back from speaking up. The more you know what is really going on for you, the more effectively you can learn how to speak up at work.

How often do you have something worth sharing, but for whatever reason, you just don’t share it? What happens is that the second before you are about to utter that statement, your brain tells you not to. It’s often based on a fear of failure or of judgment from others. Over the years, I’ve had many clients state these reasons for why they don’t know how to speak up at work.

  1. “I’m scared I might say something wrong.”
  2. “I worry that others will see me as incompetent.”
  3. “I’ll speak up, but only when I have something useful to say.”
  4. “Whatever I say has to be brilliant.”
  5. “I’m not important enough to state my opinion.”
  6. “Another person already shared what I wanted to say.”
  7. “I don’t want to interrupt.”
  8. “I’m too young; I don’t have enough experience.”
  9. “It’ll look like I’m dominating the meeting if I speak up.”

People tend to discount themselves, seeing themselves as less than others. Often, they feel almost unworthy of speaking up and sharing. When my coaching clients make any of these statements, I tell them:

Don’t underestimate the value of what you have to share. Don’t give your power away to other people by assuming that their viewpoints hold more weight than your own.

It’s common in meetings to defer to a boss, others higher up in the organization, or someone who intimidates you. However, this is just you giving your power away to others — instead of owning the moment and recognizing that what you bring to the table is as valid as any other contribution. If you’ve ever struggled with feeling unequal to someone more senior, it’s important to shift your mindset and realize that your perspective is valuable, no matter the rank or title of others in the room. 

Additionally, if people constantly talk over you at work, speak up for yourself. Hold space for your ideas by saying, “Let me just finish that thought.” Calling attention to the interruption will often cause the other person to back down. They need to recognize that you have an essential voice in the conversation, even if they’re not used to hearing it. If the problem continues, you may need to talk to the peer who’s responsible one-on-one or to get support from your boss. It’s crucial to speak up for yourself at work to make sure you’re getting the air time you deserve. 

When you learn to leverage the daily opportunities to show up as capable and confident, you’ll know how to speak up at work effectively. You’ll also reveal yourself as an impact player in the organization. Most senior people will take notice when someone stands firm in their strength. 

Come to every meeting with the mindset, “What can I contribute?” Stop being fearful; instead, trust in yourself. Have confidence in your knowledge. People want to hear what you have to say. This is the mindset shift you want and need to make.

Opinions expressed by SmartBrief contributors are their own.

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